When Times Get Tough

"Never doubt in the darkness what God told you in the light." - Dr. V. Raymond Edman

I love quotes. I always have. This one struck me to the core. I have been a Christian since I was in college. Through preaching, reading, Bible studies, conferences, conversations, etc. I learned a lot. I had great head knowledge, but those concepts I had learned have entered my conscience in far deeper ways over the past few years:

Until I was pregnant with a child I was told would not live, I had no idea what stepping out on faith meant. I knew that God would not want me to abort Catherine. I never thought for a moment that God's will would be for me to terminate the pregnancy. When the doctor told my husband and I about Catherine's condition in the womb, he assumed that we would end the pregnancy and start again in a few months with a "clean" pregnancy (that was the term he used). I told the doctor that even if she only lived an hour after birth, I would still carry the pregnancy to term. I had to step out on faith, not only not knowing what the outcome would be, but being told by specialists that the outcome would not be good.

Until I had a daughter with cancer, I had no idea what the sovereignty of God meant. I have always been mostly in control of my life, or at least thought I was. I knew that I had no control over Catherine's fate. If the chemo worked and her tumor shrunk, she would live and keep her vision. If it didn't work, the tumor could continue to grow, possible blinding her or ending her life. Additionally, the chemo would take a toll on her little body. I again had no control over the effects chemo would have on her. Her nerves would be damaged, hopefully only temporarily. Her motor skills and learning abilities may be weakened. Her balance is hampered. I have had to learn what I can control (just trivial stuff) and what God controls (the important stuff).

This post was inspired by the book "Jesus Online" by Charles Morgan, Jr.

Praying for Future Needs

Jesus said the following:

20"My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, 21that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. - John 17:20-21

Wow! Jesus was not only praying for the disciples and the people he knew, but also for all of "those who WILL" believe. That includes me, 2000 years later! That makes Jesus' prayer list of infinite length ...

I cannot even imagine praying for future, as yet unknown people and needs. (Of course I lack omniscience).

I have trouble remembering to pray for my immediate family's current needs. A few months ago in Sunday School class a friend of mine said that she prays every night with her young children for their future health, schooling and spouse. This seemed strange to me at the time.

We consider ourselves lucky if we can get my two year old to sit still during prayer. When my four year old prays, she copies the "script" we have always used: "Thank you for Mommy, for Daddy, for me and for sister. In Jesus' name, amen." We are so tickled when she recites the script we have unintentionally taught her.

I am torn. I do feel convicted to add future needs and people to my prayer list. But, my current lack of discipline in my prayer life is such that praying for current needs seems to be an accomplishment in itself. Can I do more? Of course I can. But will I?

This post was inspired by the book "Jesus Online" by Charles Morgan, Jr.